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![]() "The worst is yet to come:" The worst some always fear; Go forward bravely, then, |

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Chorus And surely ye'll be
your pint stowp! We twa
hae run about the braes,
Chorus We twa hae paidl'd
in the burn, Chorus And there's a hand, my trusty
fiere! Chorus Note:
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| A Burns Supper |
| Haggis Recipes (Hold on to your stomachs!) |

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Let me be true as the steel
of a blade, Let me be brave when the
burden is great, Spare me from hatred and
envy and shame, Let me be true to myself
to the end, ![]() |



My Dear Fellow-Grumblers:
Poets,
philosophers, and fools, in all ages, have been writing and preaching
on the art of being happy, without a mighty sight of seals
to their ministry, I guess.
But, as many can't be satisfied
unless miserable in body and mind, I am going to show all
such persons the several means to be used for the attainment of
such a desirable end.
In the first place, my beloved whiners,
in order to attain an end, you must set up a stiff resolution
and determination to conquer. Yes, my hearers, you
must set down your foot, grit your teeth, let your resolution
be as stiff as boilerplate, let your firmness be as unwavering
as the rocks of Gibraltar. Be determined to be miserable,
and you shall get your desires. Never mind what people tell
you about the bounties of Providence and the beauties of nature,
the balmy breezes of spring, the twittering and warbling of birds,
you must sheer off from them like a wealthy upstart from
a poor relation.
Put on a sour, savage, snapping-turtle
physiognomy; look daggers, and act out your feelings; this
is the first great commandment with misery: Think you
are the most forsaken mortal that misery ever held a mortgage
on. Hate mankind; call 'em all liars, cheats, swindlers,
villains. Look at everything on the wrong side. If
it has no dark side, make one, just so as to enjoy yourself
looking at it. Take it for granted that everybody about
is especially interested to torment you. Fight everybody
and everything. You can't hit amiss. The world is
all wrong. Everybody is a villain but yourself,
and it is your duty to teach mankind manners. Go at 'em.
You can't fail to be miserable.

Clocks, Clocks, Clocks!

Greenwich Mean Time
Take your children to where time begins and teach them about.
How
Stuff Works: How Pendulum Clocks Work
How Stuff Works: How a Digital Clock
Works
Learn all about what makes digital clocks and wristwatches tick,
plus learn how to create your own!
How Stuff Works: Inside a Wind-up Alarm
Clock
See the inside of a classic wind-up alarm clock and find a ton
of gears!

|
What do
you wish? To be known as a shirk, Nobody here
will compel you to rise; So, whatever
it is you are wanting to be, |


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